Thursday 20 February 2014

The End?

I received my final rejection today. 

I'm glad it came today, as after yesterday I'm not sure I'd have the optimism to prepare for an interview.
I'm glad it's a wrap for 2014.
I'm glad the application process is finished. 
I'm glad I don't have to wait in some type of limbo anymore. 
I'm glad I can now just focus on getting my grades. 
I'm glad Sussex have offered me an alternative degree.
I'm glad I have an offer from KCL. I'm glad I finally, for the first time in about a year feel free(ish).

Maybe rejection IS good.

I think I need to wait it out to see if medicine is truly for me now, I have mixed feelings. I've enjoyed everything I've seen on this short journey and I'm glad I got to experience how hard the process really is. 

Hats off to anyone who has made it through. 

I'm glad.

Wednesday 19 February 2014

Let's play catch up.

So, I haven't posted in a while...a long while - apologies. I'll just play the 'sorry, I was busy with a-levels' card and hope you'll understand. So what's happened during this time? Well...

I've received 3 uni rejections for medicine, I'm still waiting on one. I can't lie, I am crushed. But, I can't say I didn't expect this, infact this is something I was expecting the most, even waiting on - however cynical that sounds. However, I know I gave my application my all and the simple truth is that it wasn't enough (however much that sucks to say).

I'm hoping I'll pull myself together after a couple of days, sometimes a bit of mopping around is all it takes. I've still got my offer from kings and I'm still very thankful for that, however the appeal of a gap year is growing quickly.

I feel like I haven't been able to take advantage of being an a -level student in terms of the whole driving, being 18 experience. I've been so devoted to my application, my subjects, my extra curriculars I think I've missed the point of *having fun*.

Speaking of which, I've started on a 20 week hospital placement. I started of at AAU but decided to switch to the surgical ward, a choice I'm so glad I made. Following these rejections my volunteering here has put things in perspective for me. It's made me think long and hard if medicine is for me. I think it still is. It's also motivated me and kept my passion for the subject up, something I feel has been slipping very quickly due to the rejections.

It's funny, when I started this process I'd always said the rejections wouldn't get to me. I was so overcome with the fascination of being a doctor, almost blinded that I believed nothing would burn my passion out. I fully believed it was my dream. Although, midway through my A2's I've found motivation is hard to find when passion is lacking, which is what's happened.

Until next time,

comment and let me know about how you keep motivated.